Apr 26, 2011

Special Note

I've been with him for almost 4 months and I admit we had loads fight.
But believe me, none of them could stop me from loving him or make one of us walk away and move on. NONE.
I'm doing good with my studies, I shut the principle and the headmistress's mouths up with my improvement at scool especially in studies plus I'm no longer a trouble maker.
I swear, I never stand this long with no fight and no more max volume of my voice.
It's pretty hard to stay in this situation but I'm doing great so far.
When people talk bad behind me, I didn't go to them and punch them, no more.
But my boyfriend taught me one thing, he said "Smile" cause it's the enemy's weakness and their breaking part.
I did and believe me, he was right.
His parents really help me with giving me advices and taking care of our relationship.
They even worry if we break up, well that's not gonna happen, InsyaAllah.
I have nobody who could be in the same boat as me at school other than him(my boyfriend), Andrew of course but we're no longer a bestfriend. Just a normal class/schoolmate. I'm pretty good with it and could take it as long as it's school stuff. We are in the same group in Science lab, same group in BI, same group in sport, lol I swear it's not easy and awkward.
But as I said, I'm all fine with it.
I'm happy with my current life, and I'm living it.
As you guys can see, I rarely update my notes, unlike before. No more 24/7 online.
Go to school, follow my boyfriend to his house and spend time watching korean movie with him until 5/6 or sometimes we go to library, dinner with his family and he got tuttion at 6 or 8 in two hours while me studying at home till 10 and do what I usually do before sleep, call him until he fall asleep.
It's kinda bored, but I like it. I don't feel like I'm lifeless anymore, you know.
And we only can go out on Friday and Saturday. Movie is on "a must" list now.
Well, i might like it but not him. It's like a new life to him and I understand. he's not a bookworm like me.
Trust me, He could fall asleep just by listening to craps or looking at book's cover.
He stopped smoking, I kiss him every fucking day and the smell is so diff than before. So I know if he smoke or not.
He don't even go party anymore, no more drink drunk. He even do his pray and i fucking proud with him.
Just like I said, I know it's torturing him. Having a Gf who nags like his mom, and living in his own home which is he call prison.
I feel you, honey. But soon you'll know why are they doing that to you.
It's for your own good. I'm not saying this with no point but I've been there, worst than you and when the day come, you'll know.
You're a easy person, you loves your friends so much and listen to them eventho you know it's wrong and that's why I'm being just like your mom here.
You said, I nag like your mom, hit you like your mom. Just like her, you know what?
You're going to find yourself a wife who could be just like your mom, one day when you think again.
You know it's true. For now, you don't have to take this serious because I know we are young and our main priorities are family and studies.
It's not that I'm taking you easy, you know how much I love you, my man. You know how much I care about you.
I'm sorry for nagging at you but think again honey, I nag about your future, and mine too.
I want to see your name on top and screw those mothafucka's heads who couldn't stop judging you.
For now, let them talk and we do the walk okay?
Trust me, I do all ths for your own good. Drop the dark side and look at the bright side.
You don't even fight with your mom like before anymore. We all know MOMS COULDNT STOP NAGGING and we as a childs only could listen and try to deal with it.
I admit we need a friend to survive but when no one look at us or turns away, the only one who would take us back is our family. Put them on top.
No matter how bitchy they are, without them you won't meet your friends now, you won't meet me.
I swear on Allah S.W.T's name, the only one. I really love you, there's no the word "cheating" in my life since I was born into this world. And it wont happen. I know myself and I know how far I can go for someone I love.
You are special and weird, and it makes you special in my eyes. Funny guy is the man now.
I know it might be the trillion times, but you are uber cute when you upset, sulk at me, when you give me that "poyo" face, when you laugh, even when the tears fall from your eyes. Your face is fucking red.
You are hardworking but you have to know where to put the hardworking word when it comes to our life.
Not just in career but in studies and how we take care our sibs and parents's heart.
You are caring, no doubt. You listen to me and never disobey me everytime I ask you to do something.
Eventho how lazy you are on that time, you never say no to what I want.
That shows how you do really care and love me actually. I'm seriously serious, I'm fregging proud of you.
Life always fair but we make it unfair, so honey. Let's plan and change our life to a better life. And see how is it going if we walk in the right track.
InsyaAllah, we will make it.


Yours Always,
Pell <3